Much of the latest episode centered on Sookie and Bill which meant that it was a lackluster episode. When will television realize that nobody likes the main characters? Jack and Kate can go die in a cave. Will and Grace are only background props for the Jack and Karen show. Dawson is universally hated by mankind. I mean, don't get me wrong, an episode full of Lafayette calling his cousin a hooker would be a little trying so you have to break it up somehow but make sure to divy up your scenes in an entertaining fashion.
So, Sookie, Bill and Jessica are in Dallas. Sookie is thrilled to meet another telepath and manages to scare him off in no time at all. See, even strangers find Sookie annoying. For my money I think this kid's just playing her and he's going to end up being an even more powerful telepath than she is, working with the forces that tried to kidnap her. I've been wrong before though. Occasionally.
There's a lot of vamp infighting going on in the Dallas compound. Unsure of what to do about the escallating danger revolving around the missing Godric and Sookie's near kidnapping, two sides are quickly formed. The first, headed by some large vampire dude who looks like he belongs in soft core porn and plays the one note of "I HATE HUMANS!" a little look dully is repudiated by Eric, Sookie and some sexy vampire lady who later asks about Sookie's human/vampire relationship. Eric is unusually quiet on the subject until Sookie suggests that she infiltrate the camp and try to gain knowledge of their goings-on. It is then that we learn the origin of Eric's strong feelings for Godric: he is his maker.
In what turned out to be the best scene of the episode, we get a juicy flashback to Eric's human days. Wrapped in furs and carrying a Beowulf shielf Eric is dying from a battle wound. His comrades vow to stay with him through death and even build him a funeral pier. How sweet. The highlight of the scene comes when they're talking about dining at Valhala and listing the things that will be there to which studly Viking Eric claims, "Wherever I go, there will be women." As he lays dying, a red flash of a sprite rips through his friends and their blood suspends in the air for just a moment. Bad ass Eric doesn't bat an eyelash as the thing that has just murdered his friends perches itself upon his pier and confirms that he is in fact Death. And suddenly, every idea that you've had of Godric disappears from your mind. He looks like a boy, small and nimble, with a mop of thick, matted black hair atop his head. And his body, thin and pubescent is covered in tribal tattoos and markings. When they said thousands of years I think they meant it because those markings looked Egyptian, maybe even Mesopotamian.
And that's when I got a little lightbulb aflame in my head. We know someone else who's into regalia that old. Perhaps Maryann and her bull's head ass had something to do with the disappearance. Perhaps these two knew each other a long time ago.
Speaking of Maryann, the party at the Stackhouse home is still raging and Sam is just about to do the dirty with Daphne. After leading him on a clothes trail hunt after her in the forrest (designed to make the audience fear the worst), she reveals herself as another shapeshifter! And she changes into a dear, which is just about the cutest thing ever. Arlene and Terry stumble upon the duo and I love that Arlene (played by Ben Linus' IRL wifey and in Lost mama) makes the choice to still hate Daphne. The relationship is finally consumated after a rough night at Merlottes after the boss and terrible waitress finish closing up. All I'm going to say is that there is a pool table involved and the two of them mention the words "rack" and "balls".
So what happened at Merlottes that night? Well, it all began after Tara told Maryann that she couldn't move into Sookie's. I mean, it seems like a perfectly reasonable thing to say, "Hey, it isn't my house so I can't really clear 3 people living here. Also, I don't really want to carry your demon spawn. Kthxbailing." But Maryann gets angry. And you wouldn't like her when she's angry. She parks outside Merlotte's and creates the night from hell for Tara. Everyone's yelling at her and she's totally behind and her personal business is now the bar's business and the tips certainly aren't enough to make this night better. Sounds like a regular Friday night of working in a restaurant from my experience, but it's enough to make Tara ask Maryann--now wearing Gram's clothes? and reading a cookbook--to live in the house that isn't hers.
Oh stop, rewind. She also asked Eggs what his and Maryann's deal was. He dodged the question but it was an excellent opportunity for Tara to deliver the line, "What are you guys, nomad? Fucking Bedouins?" Priceless.
Hopefully the next episode will be better. It looks promising with a preview of Lafayette getting surprised by Pam in dry storage, asking him to sell V again (he returned this episode in full eyeliner, do-rag and lip gloss). Also, Sookie is entering the Fellowship of the Sun with some mystery dude she's saying is her fiancee. AND Bill's maker is in town and Eric is trying to get her to bang Bill. Should be good.
P.S. Who else thinks Jessica using that bald dude's phone to call Hoyt is going to bite everybody in the ass?
Who ordered the AIDS burger?
2 comments:
I love this. So much. Oh, True Blood.
Also, if you had to pick one, who is your favorite character?
Lafayette. No question.
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