Stop Staring at that Box, You'll Ruin Your Eyes

For Better or Worse

With summer leaving a major lull in scripted programming, I thought I'd make some fun little lists to fill the time. I must confess, I'm also totally influenced by holing up in my New Jersey love nest with my very own Desmond. So, here goes---the best, and worst, T.V. couples. (Couples had to exist on a show that was currently on the air, currently be a couple--or on and off so frequently that they might presumably be on again next week--and only one couple from each show was allowed in each category. This was good for Grey's which would have had alot of bad couples and bad for FNL whose couples are full of win.)

Best:

Desmond and Penny (Lost)

The boob tube's thematic juggernaut uses this couple as its biggest chess piece when it comes to the issue of destiny. Penny, an heiress with a heart of gold, falls for the charming boy from the wrong side of the tracks. Although, dear old dad, the United kingdom military, a magical island and the space-time continuum try to keep them apart, these two find a way to be together. And create beautiful children by the way. Desmond's devotion to their love is the only thing that makes waiting ten years for a phone call make sense.

These two are the most despicable, vapid and self-congratulatory couple on television. Alone they are a spoon-fed megalomaniac and empty faith spewing bimbo respectively. Together they are everything that is wrong with youth and entertainment in this day and age. Spencer is frighteningly close to descriptions of controlling abusive boyfriend/managers and Heidi is ready at any moment to throw her loved ones and self-respect under the bus to appease the beast. They're just the worst.